Honesty is the bedrock of any meaningful relationship. Even if you are casually dating this person and far from being in a serious relationship, having to deal with lies all the time can quickly turn things sour. Here are a few tips on dating a compulsive liar and keep your cool at the same time. The latter kind of people would occasionally come up with minor lies with the main motive of making you feel better or to hide an unpleasant truth from you.
For instance if your date praises your hairdo when you know it is far from perfect, it is a white lie indulged in order to make you happy or gloss over an unpalatable truth. While responses of these people cannot be trusted completely, still you know they mean no harm. The falsehoods in case of a compulsive liar are motivated by a desire to boost the ego or control another person.
Stay away Once you have correctly identified a person as a compulsive liar, consider whether you are willing to put up with such an ambivalent personality forever. It is very difficult for a compulsive liar to differentiate between harmless lies and those which are potentially damaging to a relationship. They lie as a matter of course and not guided by how you will feel.
And since mutual trust is one of the basic requirements of a fulfilling relationship, dating a compulsive liar is sure to dating a pathological liar a lot of stress. You will be left constantly wondering what is true and what is a lie and is no way to live your life. Get rid of the motivation to lie However if you are really serious about your date and want to give the relationship a decent chance, then you will need immense amount of patience to deal with a partner who is a compulsive liar.
A comparatively harmless reason for compulsive lying is the seeking of attention. They may have led rather dull lives in the past without anything fantastic happening to them; thus they may have decided to take it upon themselves to add a little drama to their lives by coming up with spectacular but largely unbelievable stories. They could take a course or join a hobby club which is geared to their specific capabilities so that they taste real success and feel self-validated in an actual way.
Ask those who were around when something you were told occurred what really happened and point it out. Encourage your partner to seek help from a counselor or therapist and if need be, accompany them to the sessions. If you show up the inconsistencies, they will only spin even more elaborate tales cover up their previous lies and keep lying till you give up and let them be.
Very often they may also be delusional, believing their own lies to be true and that things actually happened as they have been describing to you. If this is the case with your partner, then no amount of pointing out the inconsistencies will help. At the same time don't call him or her a liar or shut one down totally; understand that to accuse that person using the word "liar" this may imply that one always lies, and that will cause an argument or angry feelings.
Dating a pathological liar only thing to do here is to tune out most of what one is saying and accept that this person is incapable of being forthright. If only minor issues are at stake like the response to a new dress or a recounting of childhood vacation, do not try to point out their less obvious lies; rather give them some leeway and take what they say with a big grain of salt. But matters may be dating a pathological liar when your partner lies about serious issues like money, employment and current relationships.
The best way to confront this type 72 virgins dating service coin dating a pathological liar is to let them know that dating a pathological liar are aware dating a pathological liar what was said is "not accurate", or "is not right", or is "not valid" -- but don't act as if you are sitting in judgment over them and don't try to disprove. Eventually though if you are interested in a long term relationship with this dating a pathological liar, the only solution is to seek professional help for your partner.
Compulsive lying can worsen to the level of a dysfunctional personality and it is not unknown for such people to have harmful addictions. They may need to lie constantly to obtain money for alcohol or drugs. Even if your situation is not so threatening, in the long run compulsive lying needs to be treated if want to have a trusting and transparent relationship with your partner.
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How Dating A Compulsive Liar Destroys Your Ability To Trust
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